| My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One-Night Stands |  | Author: Chelsea Handler Publisher: Bloomsbury USA Category: Book
List Price: $14.95 Buy Used: $5.01 as of 9/4/2010 19:28 EDT details You Save: $9.94 (66%)
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Seller: CDC Books Rating: 506 reviews Sales Rank: 234
Media: Paperback Pages: 213 Number Of Items: 1 Shipping Weight (lbs): 0.5 Dimensions (in): 8.1 x 5.4 x 0.7
ISBN: 1582346186 Dewey Decimal Number: 306.7 EAN: 9780733619632 ASIN: 1582346186
Publication Date: June 6, 2005 Availability: Usually ships in 1-2 business days
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| • | ISBN13: 9781582346182 | | • | Condition: New | | • | Notes: BUY WITH CONFIDENCE, Over one million books sold! 98% Positive feedback. Compare our books, prices and service to the competition. 100% Satisfaction Guaranteed |
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Product Description
In this raucous collection of true-life stories, actress and comedian Chelsea Handler recounts her time spent in the social trenches with that wild, strange, irresistible, and often gratifying beast: the one-night stand.
You've either done it or know someone who has: the one-night stand, the familiar outcome of a night spent at a bar, sometimes the sole payoff for your friend's irritating wedding, or the only relief from a disastrous vacation. Often embarrassing and uncomfortable, occasionally outlandish, but most times just a necessary and irresistible evil, the one-night stand is a social rite as old as sex itself and as common as a bar stool.
Enter Chelsea Handler. Gorgeous, sharp, and anything but shy, Chelsea loves men and lots of them. My Horizontal Life chronicles her romp through the different bedrooms of a variety of suitors, a no-holds-barred account of what can happen between a man and a sometimes very intoxicated, outgoing woman during one night of passion. From her short fling with a Vegas stripper to her even shorter dalliance with a well-endowed little person, from her uncomfortable tryst with a cruise ship performer to her misguided rebound with a man who likes to play leather dress-up, Chelsea recalls the highs and lows of her one-night stands with hilarious honesty. Encouraged by her motley collection of friends (aka: her partners in crime) but challenged by her family members (who at times find themselves a surprise part of the encounter), Chelsea hits bottom and bounces back, unafraid to share the gritty details. My Horizontal Life is one guilty pleasure you won't be ashamed to talk about in the morning.
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Showing reviews 1-5 of 506
A perfect trashy review March 4, 2009 G. Zemanski 81 out of 87 found this review helpful
This is a classic memoir of some ridiculously funny random sexual experiences, coupled with rampant alcohol and drug overindulgence. Chelsea's is a rare breed; a talented comic and contagious writer. Each chapter is an outlandish collection of the painful things that go wrong in her sexual conquests and latent promiscuity. The midget sex story was my favorite. Oh my!
Some great one-liners and insults in every other sentence.
Very embarrassing and hilarious stories, right from the first chapter. Chelsea is the ultimate tomboy, and can be outrageously funny. What makes this book so great is the shock value. Not just the content. Heavy drinking, drugs, and numerous sex partners are just not what you expect to read from an accomplished woman. It's just so very rare a girl is so open about her excess indulgence and spontaneous sex life like this.
She has a real talent at storytelling as well, which comes from her stand up comic days.
For fans of this genre, I'd also highly recommend the male version of this book for out of control laughs. Ripping comedy - outrageous penthouse letter stories.
High Heels and Dirty Deals - Globetrotting Tales of Debauchery from a Binge-drinking Nymphomaniac
I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE SEQUEL! May 14, 2005 Stefanie Taylor (Encino, California USA) 57 out of 80 found this review helpful
I just finished reading "My Horizontal Life" and I have to say, it was the most fun I think I've ever had reading a book. I was laughing so hard at some of these stories that I was calling people up to quote lines over the phone (I know that's annoying if you're on the other end but it had to be done). In fact, when I finished reading it, I picked it back up and read a couple of the stories again.
As a fan of stand-up comedy (the author is a comedienne), I expected the book to be full of jokes and it is, but what I didn't expect is that it would be so revealing, sweet and engaging. By the last page, I felt like I knew the author as well as some of my closest friends.
Whether or not you yourself have had a one-night stand, you will be able to relate to the things that happen to her. Okay, maybe we haven't all dated a male stripper who's "every gay guy's fantasy" but we've all dated someone we sadly discovered is not so bright or who doesn't have a good grasp of our language. Personally, I think even a nun would find this book amusing. But I wouldn't buy it for her. I'd hope she'd just stumble upon it on her own.
I've read many humor book over the years and the problem with a lot of them is that they're just not that funny. This one delivers.
A Collection of One-Night Stands May 18, 2005 shannon fitzsimmons (Rhode Island) 2 out of 2 found this review helpful
If you've got a few bucks in your pocket, skip the Martini at
Lunchtime, and head for the nearest bookstore and purchase this
Must-Have.Read one chapter a day, stretch it out as long as you can and you naillm regain a feeling of total wellbeing.
You will laugh until it hurts.You will read about things you have only dreamed about, and discover things your imagination could not even come up with.
So, pamper yourself, loose yourself in a world that you are not really part of,---or so you think.
It's the BOMB! May 19, 2005 Jeff (LA, CA) 2 out of 2 found this review helpful
First of all, it couldn't be any funnier. It's about time that a female writes a book with as much candor and chutzpah as any male when recounting their one night stories to the guys. So refreshing to find something this candid and truly funny in an over-sensitized world of censorship. Finally, someone with a strong point of view who won't couch it to spare anyone! I love it. She's just so funny!
Totally Hilarious June 16, 2005 Heather Camp (Minneapolis, MN) 2 out of 2 found this review helpful
I bought this on the suggestion of a friend and could not put it down. It's hilarious and so TRUE. For anyone who has ever had a few too many drinks and had a one-nighter, had to endure "the walk of shame" or listened to their friends stories of random hook-ups - you will not only relate but laugh until it hurts.
Showing reviews 1-5 of 506
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